“The face is the reflection of the heart” - anonym

I read that somewhere. Face is the mirror of your heart.

If one feels sad, the face will show the truth however you smile wide. So does if you are terribly happy, it all shown from your face (unless you’re a great actor). to have your emotion shown by your face is one of ways to communicate how you actually feel at the moment.

Yet, since being sad and lonely avoid people to come near, many tries to hide their sadness (and sometimes anger), and pretend to be happy. That is such a pity. Human were created to hold various emotions and feelings, anger and sadness would be some of them. Although not as popular as happiness, anger and sadness help people to understand more about the world and themselves. How can one knows how to be happy if they never drown into sadness, nor they know what is peace when anger never disturbed them?

Of course, one have to be balance and wise on controlling their emotion, for we live not driven by emotions. it just one of the ways to express how do we feel. This writing does not intend to push people to spread how they feel anytime, anywhere, either. We also need to be wise. Many people need an empty room to express their feelings, especially their sadness.

There are several times in my life when I have no Idea how I feel at the moment, like today. I have such complicated thoughts over small things, I guess. One thing for sure, I choose to be happy. Because to deeply feel on something, mostly is a matter of choice.

Merupakan salah satu proses pendewasaan manusia. Dulu waktu kecil, kalau kita pingin es krim, tinggal bilang ke mama buat dibeliin. Kalau pengen makan kue di kulkas, tinggal ambil ga mikir dua kali tentang kalori dan lemak yang bertaburan di dalamnya.

Tapi manusia itu bertumbuh seiring dengan umurnya (normalnya begitu). Banyak hal yang kita pengenin belum tentu dapat langsung kita dapatkan. Dengan umur yang makin bertumbuh, seseorang yang ngidam punya Iphone/Ipad terbaru, mungkin mesti menahan diri dan pikir-pikir seribu kali sebelum membeli. Bukan karena gak punya uang, tapi lebih karena keperluannya.

Apakah yang kita inginkan sama dengan yang kita butuhkan? Tentu tidak. Saya ingin dompet baru, tapi belum tentu saya butuh dompet yang baru. Saya ingin punya mobil, tapi belum tentu saya butuh mobil. Keinginan dan kebutuhan manusia seringkali berlawanan. Anehnya, manusia kebanyakan lebih memilih agar keinginannya, dan bukan kebutuhannya yang terpenuhi.

Hal ini dapat dilihat dari contoh banyaknya doa manusia kepada Tuhan: “Tuhan saya pengen agar bisa x”, atau “Tuhan, aku ingin sekali agar si y bisa jadi pacar aku” dan banyak contoh lainnnya.

Maka dari itu, menahan diri dari keinginan bagi sebagian besar manusia adalah sesuatu yang agak susah dilakukan (kalau gak susah banget). Manusia cenderung mengabaikan kebutuhannya untuk hidup demi kepuasan egonya. Padahal ego belum tentu bisa dipakai buat hidup. Aneh memang manusia itu.

Kayak aku sekarang ini (ketahuan kan…curcol..), menahan diri dalam mengatasi emosi. Bukan hanya emosi dalam bentuk amarah, kadang dalam bentuk kangen. Bukan karena gengsi, namun lebih pada pengendalian diri. Aku berpikir kalau misalnya pelepasan emosi itu disalurkan (meledak kalau marah, atau telfon kalau kangen) dilakukan, efeknya itu apa? baik atau buruk, atau bahkan insignifikan? kalau bobot efek baiknya kurang dibandingkan kedua efek lainnya, buat apa aku tunjukkan emosi tersebut?

semua hal yang dilakukan ataupun ditunjukkan hendaknya membuat kita bertambah bijak dan menjadi berkat buat orang lain. Kalau itu hanya bikin orang lain kesel dan sakit hati, apa baiknya ditunjukkan dan diumbar? Hal ini bukan semata untuk menyenangkan orang lain, namun demi pembelajaran diri sendiri. Bagaimana diri sendiri dapat belajar untuk lebih bijaksana dalam mengatur emosinya.

Susah memang, belum lagi godaan-godaan seringkali begitu berat. Namun, manisnya kesabaran dan ketekunan dalam belajar menahan diri itu jauh lebih nikmat ketika kita bisa melewatinya di depan nanti.

Happy Thursday,

cheers!

A quote told me that if it’s important for a people, they will make way to make it happens. if it’s not that important, they’ll make excuse. I find that is true.

the quote is actually applicable to explain every decission-making in many area: life, love, future, past, daily check-list, etc.

in a side, this quote helps me decide which road would I want to make in this life, and how can I make it happens. in other side for another case, this quote is a bummer for me, I feel a bit rejected and not that important.

not that I blame anyone for this, it’s only myself who could allow me thinking and feel the way I am. on second thought, it happens in life and the best I can do is just be thankful for the life I have, I believe everything happen for a good reason I might not understand yet.

so yes, since i’m never a quitter, I will make my way to make it happen the best I could, and let the result be in God’s hand.

Love never fails. I Corinthians 13:8

A love that never fails! Hard to imagine, isn’t it?

Has human love ever failed you? I’m guessing your answer may be, “Yes it has—more times than I like to admit!”

I Corinthians 13:8 promises that “love never fails.”

Not God’s kind of love anyway.

I sense you may be so thirsty for this type of love. Those who should have loved you didn’t. Those who could have loved you didn’t. You were left at the hospital. Left at the altar. Left with an empty bed. Left with a broken heart. Left with your question “Does anybody love me?”

Listen to heaven’s answer. God loves you—with a love that never fails.

Personally. Powerfully. Passionately.

Others have promised and failed. But God has promised and succeeded! God loves you with an unfailing love. And His love—if you will let it—can fill you! Come thirsty—and drink deeply!

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Notes: this is a nice note from Max Lucado I’ve taken from Dersi, a good friend of mine :). Hei, Cantika! I post this for you! ;)

lovequotesrus:

Photo Courtesy: hanxiaotian

I don’t want to become too comfortable with myself that I feel it is troublesome if I involve romantically with someone.

getting to know each other in a relationship requires sacrifices of emotions and characters of each person involved. and ones need to learn how to deal with their feelings and what about their couple’s characters.

it takes willingness, and also hardwork to make the best out of one relationship. it takes both parties to cooperate together. let it fails or succeed, what matter is that you learn to grow within the relation.

if then those words not there, then it is not love. Love is hard, eh?

(Source: lovequotesrus)

benlaksana:

The Jakarta Globe, September 3, 2011

By Ben K. C. Laksana

Recently I attended a lecture by Anies Baswedan, a scholar behind the Indonesia Mengajar foundation that sends young prominent Indonesians to the very ends of the country to become volunteer teachers. During Anies’s presentation on the…

Life would not always ideal as we might fantasize in our mind. lots of unfairness, lots of grieve, and it won’t always black and white.

couldn’t say that things will always go our way, but that what makes life’s colorful, and the best part is life is a learning process. it makes us mature in some ways.

take it. embrace life. for that way you earn the meaning of your existence.

an encouragement note :)

so this is what it feels like. to spend your birthday night as if this is ordinary day. no families nor close friends around, and befriended with the cold mists of the night rain (this might be a little bit dramatic).

overtime at the office on your birthday sounds so annoying. feels like got no life except working. but if you’re staying close any intense project, this might be normal. people more care on finishing deadlines than taking a rest and have a chill at night.

birthday is a special ocassion particularly for the person celebrating the day. it supposed.

happy 23rd birthday, me!

-28th June 2011-

what are you doing when you know, and realize, that actually some people badmouthed you behind your back?

bad-mouthing about other people behind your back, especially when they are not doing you wrong with purpose, just a worse way to make yourself feel better.

we’re human. the same mere human. me is never better than you are, nor you compare to me.

if i shall answer my own question above, I would say: i would cry, because i’m a girl and I feel hurt. and betrayed. especially if i know the people whose badmouthing about me behind my back.

but will hurt do me any good? no.

what i can do now is to forgive. and let go. i shall remember that i’m not perfect, nor they are. i can never satisfy everyone with my existence, nor them to me and the rest of the world.

i’m learning, my friend, but just to keep in mind: i ain’t saint, and don’t judge on people just because you think you’re better. because we’re the same.

When people say ‘I don’t care what people say, or think about me’, I feel like somehow there’s lie in it.

We actually care about what people may think or say about us. At least I do. The ways to respond them that are different.

We care, because more or less, we do have insecurity in our lives. some people think by ignoring gossips about ourselves, would make them tougher. Some other, who are less confident, try to change how the world wants to change them. Some prefer to shelter themselves by being mysterious and share little of their life to others.

But the reason behind it always the same. We are all afraid to get hurt. If we put in mind the harsh words people saying, we would eventually get hurt. There are little who are brave enough to not shutting down their characters and still respond life positively. Yet many others choose other options.

We actually can see the fruit of despair and typical characters of person who still bear the hardness of their life on their shoulders. Those whose habits is being cynical, or love to throw harsh words, or manipulative, have no confidence, and many others. In the end, all the people whose life always causes despair to others, I can assume, they have big wound need to be healed.

I always learn if we want to go to the next step we need to let go. Forgive the thoughts and sayings of people about us, our lives, our habits. Forgive the people who hate us, forgive our friends because they are human and can not be perfect, forgive our parents for the same reason, and also forgive ourselves.

The last one might seem absurd. What to forgive within myself? Yourself?

You see, we tend to punish ourselves if we think we make mistakes. The guilt, the responsibility, anything could be the trigger. I always feel sad and stressful if I know I’ve hurt someone not knowingly, and if they feel upset about it, my sadness might still linger even after I ask forgiveness from them. And I’d lost my confident. It’d be because I feel I’m capable of making my friends happy, instead I make them upset.

Well,then I learned. I’m a human. Just a human. Like any other human, I’m imperfect. Lack of perfect characters here and there. And make mistakes. I’d never have and never will always make my friends happy with my existence. But I learn, in our lackness, we learn to forgive ourselves and each other, and be the better version of us.

I care, So does Him.
Happy Easter :)
Gbu